Friday, July 28
i don't wanna make you sway
yummy-coloured tops.
If you haven already know, I'm a drama series junkie, not those lame Singapore made drama mind you, it's those overseas stylo-milo awesome dramas like The O.C, Veronica Mars, The L Word, Gilmore Girls, etc. Since those that I've mentioned in the previous sentence has ended their season and I'm waiting for a new season to fall from the blue sky, I've been watching Grey's Anatomy. Another one hell of a great show. I especially love the Meredith Grey's voice over.
Anyways, do you know that the feeling of having someone who looks forward to talking to you everynight is pretty nice. Alright, it may not be as nice as having that special someone exclusively and be treated exclusively, but it still feels good. Quite a decent way to conclude my day.
Dot dot dot. I think I sounded quite doleful to a certain extent. Haha. Pay no heed to me or maybe not.
...
No one likes to lose control, but as a surgeon, there's nothing worse. It's a sign of weakness, of not being up to the task. And still, there are times when it just gets away from you. When the world stops spinning and you realize that your shiny little scalpel is not going to save you. No matter how hard you fight it, you fall, and it's scary as hell. Except there's an upside to freefalling. It's the chance you give your friends to catch you.
- Meredith Grey
Tuesday, July 18
the line
My beautiful girlfriends.
It's all about lines. The finish line at the end of residency. Waiting in line for a chance at the operating table. And then there is the most important line. The line separating you from the people you work with. It doesn't help to get too familiar.
To make friends. You need boundaries. Between you and the rest of the world. Other people are far too messy. It's all about lines. Drawing lines in the sand. And praying like hell no one crosses them.
At some point you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That's how we're made.
So you can waste your life drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them. But there are some lines that are way too dangerous to cross. If you're willing to take the chance, the view from the other side is spectacular.
-Meredith Grey; Grey's Anatomy.
Saturday, July 15
look for clues
The text cursor thing on the blank space here in blogger dot com must have blinked for like over a hundred times before I finally decided to typed a sentence; this sentence.
What does it means to be alive? Disregarding the past. Surviving the present. Anticipating the future. Is that what live and let live means?
How many of us are just sleepwalking through this "broadway show" called life? I know I am or at least for most of the time, I am. I am what you would call, thanks to Ting for reminding me of this word,
jaded.
...
I'm really not a complicated person. I just find it hard expressing myself in a proper string of perfectly-fitted words.
Wednesday, July 5
in my head
Tell me something.
What do you want? Not what you want for your birthday or Christmas, just what do want for yourself. Be selfish for once or maybe twice. Happiness? Happiness filled with what? Woo, I'm rich, I'm happy? What happiness? I often ask myself, "What do you want right now, Marina?"
Sleep. Strange that I asked for sleep. Why? Simply because so what? If I want sleep, I'll just have to lie down, stare into the darkness and I'll get sleep, somehow. But later on, a few hours later, I'll be awake then what? What does sleep do to me? I don't really feel that much better, do you? Sleep doesn't take away the burdens, does it?
When I wake up every morning, besides hearing my mum asking me if I have school, everything seems like a blur. Not because I don't have my glasses on but because I keep thinking, "So, was that just a dream?" That refers to my life. My legs finally come to its senses and lead me to the bathroom and let myself take a shower. Once that first drop of water hit my bareskin, everything came back. Rushing through like the people in the morning at Jurong East MRT Station. Everyone rushes to board the train; just like how every bit of reality rushes back into my brain.
Now, that's when I start to take my very own sweet time to get ready for school. Why should I rush? So what if I'm going to be late? It's gonna be a bad day, anyway. Don't rush the bad day. Take your time. I remember, and will always remember, what
Rico said to me,
"Just think that everyday will be a bad day. In that way, if things turn out good, it's a bonus for you but it's bad then you won't be so disappointed because you've already expected it to be a bad day. "
Monday, July 3
dimeloooo
This is my giler, funny and not to mention beautiful -cough- classmate,
Dianty!!
Goodnight humans!
Saturday, July 1
thanks for putting that up
I see you in school and I feel like running up to you and laugh and joke with you.
But somehow, I ended up walking in a different direction and just
be with you from afar.
