Monday, June 26
won't you be my solid ground
The first to know...
The perfect label for her, I thought. In my very own imperfect eyes, she's picturesque. If only I had the talent to paint, I would have painted an awing picture of her. My guards were shattered by that same beautiful person but unconsciously, my guards grew stronger than ever. Her actions ruin me but at the same time, I grew stronger. How is that possible? Why, time, my friend. Time reconstructed your guards. Time made you stronger.
I know that
you are reading this...
I talk to you as to a friend I hope that's what you've come to be ... I look at you and see a friend I hope that's what you wanna be
P.S: Thanks
Ting for sending me the song.
P.P.S: See, you don't have to change your template to have your name here.
Friday, June 23
tomorrow will be a bad day
...
It was a mistake. Scratch that.
It was an experience. An exprience that taught me to see things not only with my two naked eyes. I know all exprience teach everyone something but this one will allow me to say, "I know how you feel", if it were to happen to any one of my friends.
I can still feel it. Not everytime, but once in a while, I do. Maybe it's good for me. It made me feel human.
...
I should have
never believe in too many things.
Sunday, June 18
keeper of the keys
Well, because I seem to have such a hard time searching for the right words to type down my feelings this week, I have decided to mention a few people here. Don't take it personally if you expected me to mention your name and I didn't.
Firstly thanks to
Angel, Ai Ling and
Aurora. Haha. Did you notice that all three of their name starts with the alphabet A. Ok, to them, thanks girls for cheering me on and I'm sorry that I was not at my best. But I personally think that despite that, we are a great team. Thanks to the mad
Isaac for his support too.
Secondly,
Wen Ting and
Natasha, just wanna say YAY for your new layouts.
Thirdly thanks to
Angel (again) and
Yong Wei, for driving. Haha.
and lastly to the PBC girls, eventhough I know that they won't read this, thanks for being such a fun and supportive opponent for four days.
I'm off for a game of badminton with my siblings and a cousin and hopefully, I can collect some form of words to pen down my thoughts. Till then, take care!
*for some reason, I sounded
funny in this entry.
edit//
| Your True Love Is a Gemini |
Why you'll love a Gemini:
Witty and sharp, a Gemini can keep up with your fast (and ever changing) mind.
You're both fun loving and free spirits. You and a Gemini can enjoy each other without expectations.
Why a Gemini will love you:
Not only can you keep up with a Gemini's sharp tongue, you can introduce a challenge or two...
You're appetite for fun and novelty will keep a Gemini interested - at least for a bit longer than usual! |
Sunday, June 11
interrogation
I've got gadgets and gizmos a-plenty I've got whozits and whatzits galore You want thingamabobs? I've got twenty! But who cares? No big deal I want more
*types* *backspace* *types* *backspace* *types* *backspace* *types* *backspace* *types*
I think I ponder on things too much. No wait, maybe not. I have no idea. I find myself saying that I don't care, I won't be bothered, I can't be bothered but yet once again, I find myself sitting down thinking about it, fill holes with emotions; unnecessary emotions. How do you do it? How do you not care and really not care? How do you not care and not think about it?
I constantly find my brain being seperated from my actual body. This brain of mine, the one that is made up of many cells, and is the control center of the body, the one that flash messages out to all the other parts of my body, is somehow lost. Maybe you got to be in my body to know how lost and away my brain is. I feel myself searching and searching for the exact thoughts so I can pen it down but I can't hence the sitting down, being quiet listening to the hypnotising Transatlanticism by Death Cab for Cutie. It's been on my repeating mode for a few days now. There's just something about that song. It makes you and your brain do funny things.
I need you so much closer.
I'm not heartbroken. I'm not lonely. I'm not hungry. I'm not thirsty. I'm not tired. I'm not sleepy. I'm not bored. I'm not quiet. I'm not chatty. I'm not thingamabob. But wait a minute, maybe I am. Maybe, just maybe. Promise never to jump into a pool of careless conclusions.
I'm ready to know what the people know
Ask 'em my questions and get some answers
What's a fire and why does it - what's the word?
Burn?
Saturday, June 10
transatlanticism
The Atlantic was born today, and I'll tell you how,
The clouds above opened up and let it out.
I was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere
When the water filled every hole.
And thousands upon thousands made an ocean,
Making islands where no island should go.Oh no.
Most people were overjoyed; they took to their boats.
I thought it less like a lake and more like a moat.
The rhythm of my footsteps crossing flat lands to your door
Have been silenced forever more.
The distance is quite simply much too far for me to row
It seems farther than ever before
Oh no.
I need you so much closer.So come on, come on
- Death Cab for Cutie
Thursday, June 8
but i see nothing
sometimes, i think that i'm like nitroglycerin; unstable and colourless.
the kinks in my life.
haha.
if only my life was just a written essay, nothing more. i would strike it off. crush the paper. throw it in the bin and burn it. bury the ashes and forget about it. start a new. plan every move.
Monday, June 5
cannonball into the water
I don't feel like typing in proper language.
Girl, if you don't want to talk to me, you can like tell me lah right but instead you make me feel like
orang bodoh like that. Or at least put aside your ugly pride/ego or whatever la eh and tell me why you're being weird. I feel so stupid can.
And if you feel that I'm talking about
you then maybe it's you la. If not then, good for you or maybe you're just too fucking stupid.
Forget it lah, I'm not gonna fucking bother. You can like die for all I care. It's not that I'm gonna lose something so huge if you die.
Go go, mati lah kau.For one second, think eh or put yourself in my shoes lah. Make use of your fucking brain lah.
Saturday, June 3
the wind, it quakes
So last Thursday, 1st June, the
2nd Brunswick Collegiate League 2006 started. The first venue was at
Tampines Safra (damn far!).
Joel, Victor, Nadhirah and I played. I think we did good. It was a good night. I reached home at midnight and strange enough, I wasn't sleepy at all. I was chatting with
Fidz till 3.30am. Honestly, we didn't realise the time! I had loads of fun crapping with him.
i'm so tired, i've had enough.
i always thought that it would get better.
mained and numb, i have been to wrong to feel. I woke up the next morning and then I can feel all the achings! I couldn't open my eyes even. I was at the living room couch wearing my socks and then I just fell to the side and close my eyes for like 5 minutes. Ahh. Oh the tiredness. Dragged myself to school. I thought I could take a nap in the train because i have like 20 mins of napping time
BUT I bumped into this new year 1 bowler, so yea, I can totally forget about napping because we talked about bowling (which I don't really mind because I love talking about bowling).
Had training after school. It was fun of course but my sliding leg's knee (left) was killing me! Really. I thought that I could just fall any moment. But! I have to be firm with myself and just bowl.
When I was walking home when I reach lakeside at 10pm, I felt so...
angry,
exhausted,
sad,
happy.. etc. I wanted to just drop down from wherever I was and just lie there untill I feel better.
nothing to take with me not even the memories
just the thought of what was gone
and a crushed hope in what never was.
