Tuesday, January 24
I blame myself
How could you have said that you'll be lost without me?
When later on, you're the one who left me lost and alone.
How could you have said that you'll never let me go no matter what?
When later on, you're the one who left me just like that.
How could you have said that you love only me?
When later on, you said those exact words to another.
Saturday, January 21
you are my idol
Me and Valerie Teo (National Bowler). She's awesome in everyway! Smart, talented and not arrogant. I want to be as good as she is.
Sunday, January 15
that b-b
I LIKE S.D
oh god, the cuteness of S.D is irresistable
Wednesday, January 11
blueprint
Gradually then suddenly.
That's how depression hits.
You wake up one morning afraid how you're gonna live.
found love but it got erased
I hate him. I still love him. Confused? Not my problem. I don't know why I still love him. Maybe because of his personality, charm and the things he has done for me. I went through crap for him at times too. That's just it, isn't it? He said it's over. He said,
"When it's over, it's over."I hate that phrase. I never thought that it was over even for a second. Is that it? There's no chance of us giving another chance at this? Not even friends?
He probably hates me right? So here I am, forcing myself to hate him so it would be "balance".
FINE. I don't hate him. I can't love him. I don't hate him. I have to feel something. I'm human, you know.
I'm happy that we happen. That's all that matters to me. But oh man, it hurts like fuck to see that I let him go to someone else. But things happen and love never has a happy ending.
Am I right?
Monday, January 9
you went away. you went away.
Why am I doing this to myself?
Why am I letting it get to me?
This year was suppose to be different.
I wasn't suppose to wallow anymore.
Please stop it. It really hurts.
Sunday, January 8
the masterplan
The guy in the center, Chee Yuan, is NOT my teacher. He had to attend some idunnowhat. The other guy is actually taller than the both of us. He's just trying to make me feel good about my height.
Shahid was in my class on friday for like 3 minutes. He was at my table to be exact. He was asking my teammate something about that day's lesson. I gave him a smile but inside I have a million things to say to him. I stole a glance and noticed that he's getting even more good-looking each day.. or is it just me.
I wish everything would go back to normal.
Friday, January 6
I want a chinese boyfriend and not just because HE has a chinese *swallows saliva* girlfriend.
Wednesday, January 4
he's different
So hiiiiiii... I haven been updating this thing since 1973. So i'm here now :)
Life for me is not great of course. But that's nothing new. I just can't wait for this coming Varsity Open at Safra Mount Faber!! I love bowling. I wanna marry bowling. I wanna make kids who will be obssesed with bowling.
