Friday, September 30
semester two
my semester 2 is sucking and it hasn't even started yet.
it's nice to talk to you again.
i felt weird.
oh how i wish i could tell you that i've missed you.
your bloody fault.
Don't think too much. That line or phrase or whatever you call it is probably the line or phrase or whatever you call it, that i hate the most. Wait. I don't hate it. I loathe it. *writes it down on an ugly piece of paper and crushes it*
Why do people keep telling other people when the other people have told him countlessly that it's not like that sit down and think about it. Things come to mind without you knowing. We may not want to think about it but it's in our mind and it's not that small to just ignore it. So why can't people understand?
Some things aren't just as simple as other things. You understand that, yes? So why do you still tell me
not to think too much? Oh God... I swear. If one more person tells me that, I will strangle that bloody person to death. What kind of person do you think I am huh? I don't make myself think of bad things. They stick in. They don't move out.
Maybe it's not the things in my mind that drives me crazy. It's you people who seems to love using that bloody phrase or line or whatever you call it, that drives me crazy.
If I die, it's your damn fault.
Thursday, September 29
he turns 19
happy 19th birthday, shahid
Wednesday, September 28
help me
swallow me then spit me out
for hating you, I blame myself
seeing you it kills me now
no, I don't cry on the outside
anymore...
Monday, September 26
candy in the sun
cos I know a place where the sun is always shining
and I won't forget the face
the one that's gonna keep me smiling
you're like candy in the sun
you're my angel on the run
Sunday, September 25
from me to you
dear mum, dad, susi and nazrin,
i'm sorry for not being a hardworking daughther. i'm sorry for not being a helpful sister. i'm sorry if i didn't protect you both from whatever. i'm sorry for not making you proud of me. i tried but i just suck. when i'm not you don't have to worry about me getting into trouble.
dear rp bowling team,
i'm a terrible hook bowler. i'm sorry i wasted the school money. when i'm gone, you don't have to worry about being racist. i'm sorry for saying mean things which i dont regret saying.
dear yuhua friends,
i'm sorry for not being a fun schoolmate. i've tried but i'm just boring. i ruin the class photos. cut me out of the photo please.
dear m.i friends,
thanks for making me happy. i'm sorry for you letting you guys down. i'm sorry for not being smart. good luck with your a levels.
dear online friends,
thanks for being understanding and praising my work when it sucked. i'm sorry i wasted the web space.
don't have to worry about it when i'm gone.
dear rp yr 1 classmate,
i'm sorry for being moody once in a while. thanks for working/studying with me for that year. i love you guys.
dear rp friends,
im sorry for not talking to you guys on msn. i just dunno what to talk about. don't worry about not inviting me to anywhere. ill spoil the mood anyway. im sorry for not being pretty and fashionable.
dear ck (chun kiat),
thanks for making me realise that i'm just a tool. i'm sorry for wasting your time.
dear shahid, i love you. always. when i die,you can bring your new girlfriend to my funeral. i would love to meet her.dear hafiz,
i wish you have made up your mind about things.
love,
marina.
Saturday, September 24
i want to hide
i don't want school to start.
just let this boring holiday go on forever.
i
don't want to see him.
right?
Saturday, September 17
con-bucks
Me and
Tee took bus 187 to Woodlands Interchange and then took bus 969 to Northpoint. We are meeting some of the M.I (
the place I went for my 3 months course) friends. The 5 of us hang out at Starbucks; just drinking and chatting. I don't know if they notice but I was kinda quiet and shy. You know...the usual awkwardness when you haven meet someone for months or even years?
Tee had to leave so the rest of us just walked around Northpoint and went into almost every shop. We went to eat at
Long John Silver. I haven eat since I woke up!! After eating we all left for home. I went to Outram Park to meet my family for dinner. I didn't eat of course.
Anyways, my mum bought me that
Converse sweater (see the picture). An early birthday present :)
So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
Friday, September 16
the one with sepet eyes
I got a crush on you I hope you feel the way that i do I get a rush When I'm with you Ooh, I've got a crush on you A crush on you
Tuesday, September 13
cold, wet, lovely monday
See the first picture? That's 500ml tub filled with Dark Chocolate and Raspberry ice cream. We bought it from a shop named Venezia at Takashimaya. It was like our desert after having Burger King for dinner. We walked in the rain from Burger King (Far East) to Takashimaya. The
green spoon is Qas's, the
blue spoon is Lee's, the
yellow spoon is Tee's and the
pink spoon is mine.
Did I tell you how much I hate Bus 132? It's been a long time since I took that bus to school. I decided to take it yesterday because it was 11.45am and it's really hot. I waited for more than 15 minutes but that bus still not there. I can't read my book while waiting because I'm afraid that I'd let the bus pass without noticing and probably get even more annoyed. So I just sat there staring at the direction where the bus is gonna come and well, day dreaming at the same time. Haha.
Bus 33 came and to my suprise, Sherman alighted from that bus. :) At least I have company now.
I think this is by far the best day of this September holiday.
Why do you have to be so cute?
It's impossible to ignore you
Must you make me laugh so much
It's bad enough we get along so well
Saturday, September 10
horny garfield
The photograph on the left is a picture of Garfield humping on Doremon!! :O I didn't expect that from Garfield. Wahah... The bowling guys were just being boys and were forcing the toys to play dirty. The second photo is what I call
The NCG bowlers. What is NCG? It is "Non Chinese Group". Haha!! No no... we are not racist or whatever. The tallest Malay guy in that picture came up with the name because it's fun? LOL. The rest of the bowlers are Chinese.
I kinda had fun in the tournament. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. Sheesh... I have to start to think positively. I think the world need more positivity here and there. Negative-thinking people are always grumpy or moody or like in my case, depressed. What cause people to think negatively? What can we do to change their way of thinking? Laughter? I think, friends play a big part in making someone think positively because for me, I don't count on my parents for support because my chances of getting it from them are zero to none.
Oh whatever.
I will never find another lover
Sweeter than you
And I will never find another lover
More precious than you
Friday, September 9
the jay and the board
Check out my Jay Chou phonecard-sized thingies!! I bought them today at the
Esplanade. I had company of course. It was Farhan. The SRJC one not RP one. He turned 18 yesterday so I'd thought it would be nice if we meet up as a birthday treat because we haven seen each other since like forever? Yea, I miss him a lot.
I wonder how
Qass's pill-crusher meeting went. I hope it was okay because I don't like it when she's unhappy.
Anyways, I'll be having a bowling tournament tomorrow at Kim Seng (where else?). I hope I'll have fun and not have another meltdown. Wish me luck!! Oh! And look... I have a tagboard. LOL. I just find it funny.
Is it turning over this time
Have we really changed our minds about each other's love
All the feelings that we used to share
I refuse to believe
That you don't care
Thursday, September 8
lettersoflies no more
So here I am, back in the blogspot thing. I've stopped updating lettersoflies.org because it's something I have to let go. The person who motivates me to put effort and hardwork into that domain, sadly, has nothing to do with me anymore. I loved my domain but I have to let it go.
Things will eventually get better but things will never be normal again.
